In continuing our fun and frequent food-based adventures, Mike made reservations for us at Em Chamas! This elegantly saucy spot in the Northland of KC is more than dinner - it was an experience! We started off with somewhat of a bad first impression because while Mike was parking the car, I went inside to wait for him. The host graciously greeted me, accepted our name and immediately instructed me to follow him. I was like - let's wait for the "two" of "two of us" to get here before being seated. He waited but seemed surprised that I didn't want to venture in without my guy. But, from that point on, the evening was entertaining and enjoyable. Before I say much more though - I'll let you know that I would go back in a heartbeat if Mike initiated the meal, but I probably wouldn't make plans myself, to return.
We were in our regular out-to-dinner duds, nothing fancy, as were most of the people in the place. Though there were some with their diamonds the size of our coffee table, bags with C's on them, Armani suits and Gucci loafers, we didn't come across as pitiful.
This is probably the first time how-to-eat had to be explained to us. One look at me and you can pretty much tell I've mastered it without tutorials - but at Em Chamas - one must pay close attention to directives or one might exit with a hefty bill and an empty tum tum. Our dinner was preempted by the lesson of the medallion. One side of this cardboard medal is yellowish-green, the other side black. After visiting the unlimited fill-yourself-up-big-time-on-potatoes-salads-and-veggies-so-you-don't-eat-so-much-meat-when-we-bring-it-to-your-table bar, we were instructed to indicate to the servers we were ready for MEAT by means of the yellowish-green side up. In no time, servers
appeared at our table with their skewer, stick or sword of meat and machete to serve us our portion. We had more than enough to eat, but the wafer-thin slices granted us surprised me. I mean....after all....we're used to 10 ounce filet's that cover half a dinner plate! The sliver you see on the plate above is precisely the sliver you receive before the server asks, "Would that be enough for you, mam?" Of course - feeling like the oinker that I am, with little reluctance replied, "No sir...keep a'cuttin'." (Nah...jist a'kiddin'. Eye ain't that crass - eye kin act fancee whin eye knead two.)
I DID get tickled at one point in our formal evening though - even with just diet Coke. The server approached with his giant shish kabob and asked if I cared for his BONUS BEEF. Oh my gosh! I CCCCRRRRRacked up! I inquired, "Did you REALLY just ask that?" In a stern, articulate, and very formal voice (from a kid who I'm sure slams lockers during the week, goes parking on the hill after he gets off work, drives an old mustang, wears Nike's and has a soccer coach) without cracking so much as a smile while I'm guffawing says, "Yes, mam. It is my BONUS BEEF." I looked at Mike - he's not laughing - the kid isn't laughing and I'm convulsed; so I acknowledge that I would like to try his BONUS BEEF and after macheting it - he scurried away - I'm sure to tell his manager to keep an eye out on the crazy lady by the window.
I waited a few minutes and Mike didn't say a word - just kept sampling his rack of lamb, marinated turkey leg, roasted pheasant, top sirloin and of course, his BONUS BEEF. I couldn't wait any longer and asked him why he didn't find that a hoot. He calmly said - in his all-knowing way when I do something stupid - said, "Deb...it was BONELESS BEEF RIB." Well, you know me. Some may've shuddered at the thought of their ignorance. NOT ME! I got tickled even more and the rest of the evening was amply packed with giddiness...sans wine. It was fun - to say the least.
The bar food was fine - not exceptional - and the flow around the trough was VERY CROWDED, close and not at all easy to manage. THAT needs to be relocated so people can move around the bar without bonking butts with perfect strangers! The steak was FABULOUS but all the other roasted meats (and we sampled them all) were too salty to enjoy. The Parmesan mini-biscuits brought to our table first were quite yummy and I'm positive were calorie free and the cinnamon plantains - for clearing our palate between meats - were sweet and delicious - that is...IF you like soft bananas and cinnamon.
We weren't, but if we had been speaking of hefty bills...the website states that "Em Chamas" translates as FiRE GRILLED (I think) but Mike says that simply is not true. (He speaks no Latin languages, just so you know.) He is positive EM CHAMAS really means "THE BILL." :)
It was a quite nice evening and we have no regrets in going even though it seemed that even the silverware was al a carte! But, just know before you go...we both had soft drinks, no alcohol, we did each have a cup of Brazilian coffee after dinner and split a flourless chocolate torte for dessert (which made the whole "em chamas - as per Mike's translation) well worth it, but we remembered on our drive home, that there have been many, many times in our 35 years together that we lived in excess of a week on less than the cost of our one Em Chamas meal!
If you go - - tell them that the crazy lady by the window says HI and that you really want to try his BONUS BEEF first!
· Location: 6101 NW 63rd Terrace in the Tuileries Plaza , I-29 and 64th (
· Phone: 816.505.7100
· Price: $34.95 per person-excludes tax, gratuity, drinks and dessert.
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